The Lights are Back ON

So, i was in a depressive stupor which went into heart pains (actual) and I self-diagnosed myself with endocarditis because I had it before and knew the symptoms. They cleared up and back to the usual. Feel treated horribly. Don’t have any explanation for the behavior toward me but i wrote this after I took a shower in MY house (not owned, just living there for 20 years).

“Right now i hear Gra, Blue, Yellow, Pink and Mauve! all harassing me as if they can see me in the bathroom!

See, they are showing me! I realize now, it has nothing to do with legality, nothing to do with “good vs. evil” bullshit. In fact, i even heard them say “talking to self.”

They think they are pressuring me with exposure when i want to expose myself! (In the other way…you know) I cannot be cancelled lol.

So they have no power yet…they think they do. Even if i die or end up framed in prison (which is laughable with this lot), i have not ever just….I don’t know actually what to say. I have suffered. They have power. This is the whole spiel.

I’m trapped, they know it, and composed my cage. Now they think they are punishing me like an animal….sending a message like giving a cat a smack for pissing on the bed.

Lionsong just bought up out of nowhere after weeks of nothing. Perhaps they think it is just one recording. I have so much that i dlon’t listen to anything but are spread all over the place! Any attempt to frame or kill me will lead to their own downfall.

Or not…I’m not confident at all. Yet…i fight against the people who just wear the maskes of my Colors. They died a long time ago…or at least any sense of love for me that is.

They just pretend for no reason.

This is the plight of bipolar, addict, trying to recover. They will always fucking hate and hurt my chances not because of any other reason then because they CAN.

They have Power. Power of the Dog…what was that movie about?

Anyway, i built a roadmap of the abuse. I just need valuable assistance to help me transvers this whole world of ShIT!

But why? Why….

So Power is the reason. It’s not entertainment. Punishment because I’m possessed (not even funny, but they believe it). etc.

I’ve identified the culprit of every single dispute: power imbalance. I get the struggles of every minority. Of women. Of queer. How do you fight against a stronger power? You have to topple the hierarchy first.

Now what….What do i do?

Roadmap exists. What do i do? They are acting on the vapors of their idiotic hubris. Intoxicated. They cannot envision a problem from this little fucking speck of dust that is me. The power imbalance….fuck….”

And that is the end of my journal entry from 3-28-24….after taking a shower and hearing the SPEAKERS…fuck.